Ruby (aged 11): Mum, look! Last night I had a dream that I shaved my legs, and feel how lovely and smooth they are this morning! (I love this one - when in doubt baffle them with something magical and completely improbable)
Nic (aged 13, who is the world's worst liar and shouldn't bother trying, explaining why his phone credit was low): I think Ruby downloaded some games to my phone. (nice try Nic, maybe next time you should pick someone who is actually interested in mobile phone games and has an outside chance of getting hold of your phone.)
Max (aged 7), explaining why he needs to immediately swap taekwondo lessons for swimming lessons:
Mum, I've been thinking. It's a bit of a stereotype that I do taekwondo. It's a stereotype that boys should do martial arts. I think I should do swimming instead. And also, with all the trees that have been burnt in the fires, we could have less oxygen to breathe and swimming lessons will be useful because they will make me better at holding my breath.
I think we have a winner! Bit of a worry though, that the 7 year old is so much more creative, sincere and convincing in his bullshitting than his older siblings :)
Think I'd better go and book those swimming lessons.